Inspired by the fb statuses of one of my little cousins going off to college this week, I wrote this blog. I almost wrote something a few weeks ago when I learned that another cousin had been accepted, enrolled and changed her mind. That along with two other family members in this age ranges that have made some interesting recent choices regarding college would’ve been negative re-enforcement. So I’m glad Byanca’s excitement gave me renewed interest in writing ‘7 things that the college age kid needs to know about going to College.’
1. Go.
You would think this is a no-brainer, but it’s not. So many get discouraged and have a little fear. Believe it or not it’s normal. Anyone that tells you’re they’re not a little afraid of leaving the comfort, security and familiarity of their home aren’t living in reality. Now I know you’re excited and couldn’t wait to get away from Mom and Dad, but you are out in the real world, well at least the junior league. You need to simmer down some of that excitement. Then there are a few that are apprehensive and overly anxious. The key to both extremes is to just be careful and you’ll be alright, but …..GO!
2. Stay.
One of the most famous lines from college orientations since the dawn of time… “Look to your left, now look to your right…one of the three of you won’t make it to the end of freshman year.” And it’s true, but it doesn’t have to be you. Or your two friends/dorm mates that you made sure to sit next to in orientation. It could be the three losers sitting in the back row. But no really, there will come many possible reasons for you to consider going home and never coming back. Money, bad grades, horrible roommates, bad weather, theft, lack of transportation, bad accommodations etc. All of this might hit you in the first day the first semester or on a weekly basis. But you have to stick with it. The truth is it’ll all be worth it, and you’ll learn to adjust. Which leads me to my next point?
3. It’s all about survival skills.
My friend Lex made the point to me a long time ago, and it stuck with me, besides the specialized careers skills you gain, college is about learning survival skills. What she was saying is that you may never remember the quadratic equation, how to evaluate limits, how to go from state machine to binary numbers to algorithm to code, to bread board or how not to split infinitives (won’t stop you from blogging) but if you can figure out how to survive from the 10th of the month till the 30th on less than 30 dollars and still make the grade you will have learned one of the most important lessons.
4. Forge Lifelong relationships.
I can tell you the truth; I thought my homies from high school couldn’t get any tighter. I worried about the fact that we were going to different campuses and some not to school at all. But what happened? My friends from college have become the deepest personal relationships that I have. I only spent 4 months at FAMU, but it seems just like yesterday. People that have heard me talk about it know I tend to wax poetic. And when I came to Howard I met some of the coolest, smartest, people ever. Far too many to mention. Nothing forges friendships like hours in a computer lab sweating through lines of code. (Shhhhh! I’m trying to write Bridgit!) I cannot stress how important this time and these people were and still are in my life.
5. Don’t be fresh meat.
It’s been my experience that the more you advise people(read girls) against this point, the more they run to it. So just try not to be it. Ask a sophomore or Junior what this is if you don’t already know.
6. Prioritize.
I know you can stay up till 3 and get up at 7:50 for a class that starts at 8:10, but just because you can doesn’t mean you should. I know there is a party going on 8 days out of the week (don’t ask me how, but it’s possible) but that doesn’t mean you should go to 5 out of 8 em. Just because there are employment opportunities available doesn’t mean you should work 20-40 hours a week. (Wish I would’ve listen to that one while I was in school.) Spending every waking hour with your girlfriend(s)/boyfriend(s) is possible but boy will that cut into those 4 hours of study for every 1 hour of class time. My Niece and Nephew watched me squander away my first 3 years at Howard picking them and my girlfriend up almost every weekend. Lord I hope they learned from watching their uncle’s mistakes rather than having to walk in my footsteps. The point is you are in school to learn, everything else has to follow in prioritization. Don’t learn #2 the hard way.
7. This will be the best part of your life (to date.)
Although life can and does get better (Hey, I hear 40’s the new 20) this will have been the best time of your life to date. You know no real responsibility; you have no debt, hopefully no children and no cynicism. Enjoy it….by enrolling in college.
But you know some of these lessons we must learn the hard way. Don’t let #7 be one of the hard learned lessons. It’s a lot harder to get into college at 28, 38 and 48 than it is at 18.
